Log in

entries friends calendar profile Previous Previous Next Next
Choose your own adventure? - Satanic Panic in the Attic
Choose your own adventure?
Don’t try to find me. I’ve moved to Planet Madness.
As you may have guessed, the king of this planet is none other than The Madness himself.

I remember when we used to have tea (earth tea) and he would kick the old joke bucket around about how one day he would kidnap me and take me to his planet. Despite the fact that he was the almighty madness, I never believed him. I should’ve listened to the little hairs that shivered quietly on the back of my neck.

The day the madness took me away was a day like any other. The sky had not fallen, and Chicken Little was nowhere in sight. Fearful humans were running the streets trying their best to appear elegant and OK with it all. I was waiting for a bus downtown, creating magical stories inside my brain, followed by the usual bursts of quiet laughter and then the old quick glance around to make sure nobody saw me laughing to myself when I had no book or phone, or company…then scolding myself for caring.

Then an anorexically skinny man with a top hat and handlebar moustache sat beside me. He was blowing bubbles with his spit (bubbles as big as the balls so many of you wish you had. YEAH, that big.) He smelled like semen and sugar cookies. It was disgusting, but curiously delightful.

Just as I was about to compliment his fancy top hat, he said (in a most poetic presentation) “Derp-a-lop-a-doo. Shampa-skampa-loo. Who are you? Knives the size of Jupiter have kitty feet for souls.”

It was then that I understood…Every strange pleasant smile on the disheveled men who sit at street corners debating the politics of fish to invisible creatures around them. Every woman pushing a cart with all her posessions singing quietly…then loudly…then quietly yet again, and then the final angry punch to the air, before she silences herself and that smile appears.

Yes, the world finally made sense.

But, don’t miss me too much. I won’t be here long. The Madness doesn’t know this yet, but I have a brilliant escape plan. Or maybe he does know and I will be punished greatly…or fucked beautifully. We’ll see. Until then, I will enjoy my time here on Planet Madness just fine. I still have much to learn, and perhaps may vacation here in times to come.

For now I bid you farewell. Hope you are excellent. Wish you were here…and all of those things.

Love and loony bins,
Emily (aka…The Madness?)
19 human choked on their own vomit and died || ...but i love you
stuff_sucks From: stuff_sucks Date: September 16th, 2004 06:01 pm (UTC) (Link)


that was fun! it was like the neverending story, but without the fat kid. thanks!
runwithoutpants From: runwithoutpants Date: September 16th, 2004 06:05 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh, the Madness, it's back. I've missed it, it sure has been a while since I've heard from it.
theblitzkid From: theblitzkid Date: September 16th, 2004 06:29 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh how I've missed your entries and you. Nice to know you're still around, but you need to frequent these parts more often. Please!
From: electricsinboy Date: September 16th, 2004 07:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
hope you stick around for awhile. the madness just isn't the same without proper scrabble smack talk.
statikcat From: statikcat Date: September 16th, 2004 07:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
maybe emily will be beatable if she is madness... lets take advantage!
From: pokemyeye Date: September 16th, 2004 07:16 pm (UTC) (Link)
i <3 you.
i_like_dying From: i_like_dying Date: September 16th, 2004 07:21 pm (UTC) (Link)

four stars

hah, the old joke bucket.
From: yoyoy008 Date: September 16th, 2004 10:14 pm (UTC) (Link)

Good entry.

So, what classes are you taking this semester?
powersparkles From: powersparkles Date: September 17th, 2004 03:10 am (UTC) (Link)
you rock my socks!!
From: (Anonymous) Date: September 17th, 2004 09:27 pm (UTC) (Link)

Ahh the Madness

Curious that I should be reading your journal... err, autobiography of madness! I suspect that there are other forces at work here. Feel free to send me warp-speed grams from Planet Madness..... gods, I miss that place! hehe
Yours in space travel,
----Philonivs Maximvs GerMADicvs
chuteboxe From: chuteboxe Date: September 18th, 2004 12:01 am (UTC) (Link)
Your are like wild animal, you can not and should not be caged. May the gods bless your path back to us.
From: audienceandcast Date: September 20th, 2004 03:21 am (UTC) (Link)
come to richmond emma. loneliness is in abundance here. call me and make some plans or something 7659771985.
lafemmelolita From: lafemmelolita Date: September 20th, 2004 07:36 pm (UTC) (Link)
will you email me so we can keep in touch? florida rocks and i would love to tell you about it, but when we talk real talk i find a more suitable (for lack of..) bond. and you're as abstract in writing as i can be. mymindmachine@hotmail.. dooo iiiit!
From: armoredbaby Date: September 21st, 2004 01:59 am (UTC) (Link)

The Madness

I am still and have been circling the compound for ages. The Towers are so high and imposing. The architecture is strange and curvilinear yet not fragile looking at all. It is so calm beyond the perimeter and to pace with the 45 or so others is a lonely action. The random cries and yelps and laughter are so sporadic. the path we walk has been replaced by a sidewalk painted with ads for Freedom Towels.
achalanatha From: achalanatha Date: September 21st, 2004 06:21 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hey if you're looking to be fucked beautifully I'm always willing to help a friend out. =oP
lanky_bastard From: lanky_bastard Date: September 23rd, 2004 03:12 pm (UTC) (Link)
Mad role reversal
The insane will rule the earth
And you will dictate
From: yitzhak_avachai Date: October 16th, 2004 01:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
Am I forgiven?
From: deadmanintrunk Date: October 26th, 2004 06:25 am (UTC) (Link)
Hey, it's psychoturnip. Add me, please? You are one of the coolest people that I have ever known.
yobachi2003 From: yobachi2003 Date: November 12th, 2004 05:38 pm (UTC) (Link)
I wasn't around when you posted this, I've just recently come back to LJ.

Everyone else seems to be taking your entry in jest. I fear this is your way of saying that you're going a little loony. And I mean more than the normal controlled crazy. I hope that the others perception of your post is more corrected. And if so, I hope you'll return soon.
19 human choked on their own vomit and died || ...but i love you