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the reader is put to task when there is no face behind the mask - Satanic Panic in the Attic
girlsetsfire
girlsetsfire
the reader is put to task when there is no face behind the mask
All of a sudden, nothing in my life makes sense. The fact that it doesn't make sense is perhaps the only thing that does make sense. It all makes sense [in a most unpleasant way].

Only "unpleasant" because it is in this confusion that I have a certain clarity [as much clarity as we stupid human can have] of my life [as a whole]. But that doesn't change the fact that I have created a mess so disgusting that one toe set into it and my entire being swells with such grotesque intensity, that I am driven to do nothing but day dream all day, every day.

I wish my beautiful day dreams would come to my door step in human form, just so I could punch the bitch right in the throat.

Only I can make my life the way I want it to be. And day dreams are only a small fraction of "it all". That's the scariest thing I've ever heard.

I'm in big trouble.

Current Mood: disgruntled
Current Music: chopin/the ridiculous beat of my heart/clocks ticking

38 human choked on their own vomit and died || ...but i love you
Comments
From: xxccwcxx Date: April 19th, 2004 12:40 am (UTC) (Link)
hey emma, it's donny by the way. i just thought id tell you, your day dreams are lovly. they are who you are, and that is one hell of an awesome lady. all i know is that i miss you and i wanna come see you, it's been too long. i miss you emma. i know my 19 year old intellect can't compete with what my grandma tells me, she has been around for a long time. but she always told me that things will always get worse and then worse and even worser(she was smart, not brilliant) but they always will get better before you know it. give it a chance, as for now, you know how to get ahold of me and you know where i am, and i miss you.
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 10:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
"kill anyone with a beer in their hand"

I just imagined us hanging out and me drinking a beer, and you smashing it over my head, and indeed "killing me dead". It's all very hilarious. Really and truly?

Surely you are a dirty fibber.

Besides if you attempted to "kill me dead", then I would have to punch your throat, and my pretty pretty princess ring is pretty good to make a nice dent. And maybe I would have a sticky razorblade in my pocket which I would attach with such great quickness that later on when you thought about it you confused me with being magical. And your throat would be slit with beauty and passion.

OH man. It's great to be ridiculous. It makes me happy. How about you? Hm?

But yes, we should hang out soon. We had some great times. More are to come. Thank you for your words, they done did a lady good!
From: cyberlich Date: April 19th, 2004 04:57 am (UTC) (Link)
I find myself in similar fashion, Being lost in my thoughts locking myself in my room. It has been decided for me that .. these momments should end. Partilally by the person who i am .. and partially by the person who i should be.

outside sources have played influence. In small container they did arrive. Not shure if i am safe from the change but its time that holds the answer..
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 10:06 pm (UTC) (Link)
You are a great character. I hope you know.

And your icon makes me think your life is dreamy, and um, naked.

We should tell each other stories sometime. I've always thought so.
From: cyberlich Date: April 20th, 2004 05:15 am (UTC) (Link)
I have thought the same, sadly it seems that every time that i have seen your name on this the little outlet to the outside world, it would always appear that its your digital imposter or possibly the fabled doppleganger that i have come across, never has it disclosed when you shall be around, Next time i see you we shall exchange words.
From: kevinburgio Date: April 19th, 2004 05:11 am (UTC) (Link)
I'll make sure i wear some sort of protection around my throat. And when you call me "bitch," it sort of turns me on.
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 10:35 pm (UTC) (Link)
You are too good. How does that feel? To be "too good"?

Maybe you will explode.

One day I will find you a bloody disgusting mess [in a dark corner of course to make it all the more spooooky], and a little mouse will scurry to me, and whisper in my ear "he died from being too good".

The visions of this thought are stupidly vivid. Frankly, I'm a little creeped out.

If all that really happens, and you are dead and I can't even tell you how ridiculous it all is, I will be pissed.



statikcat From: statikcat Date: April 19th, 2004 05:52 am (UTC) (Link)
miss emily. what did you do this time!?
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 10:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
Dammit Kyle, stop looking at me like that. I've been a good girl...just too curious for my own good. Whatever that means, right? The Madness and I have taken a liking to one another, and meet every afternoon for tea and stories.

Life is pretty much just intense hilarity when you come right down to it. It's fun to never know what the hell is going on. Really.
fallennothing From: fallennothing Date: April 19th, 2004 07:15 am (UTC) (Link)
*sniffle* i miss youuuuuuu
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 10:44 pm (UTC) (Link)
Then let's hang out. DUH.

fallennothing From: fallennothing Date: April 20th, 2004 07:05 am (UTC) (Link)
call a brotha up then you turd
lanky_bastard From: lanky_bastard Date: April 19th, 2004 09:12 am (UTC) (Link)
Sometimes I feel that.
"GET A JOB, YOU BUM!" says mum,
Monkey on my back.
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 10:49 pm (UTC) (Link)
I keep saying your words in such a way that when placed inside the bodies of various strange characters, and situations, cause me to stamp my feet and let out a mighty laugh.

I can only assume these images stem from an original hilarity that came straight from the great brain of Simon [himself].

Well, duh. I'm just saying, keep on keepin' on. Right?

lanky_bastard From: lanky_bastard Date: April 20th, 2004 09:01 am (UTC) (Link)
My words are creatures
Like haiku body snatchers
Making people fun
From: pokemyeye Date: April 19th, 2004 10:24 am (UTC) (Link)
::hugz::
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 10:50 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks for the thought.
From: electricsinboy Date: April 19th, 2004 11:50 am (UTC) (Link)
i aways prefer punching reality. it's kind of fun to bob and weave peppering him around the face with combos of jab cross jab and cross cross uppercut. reality has done tons of roadwork so you should never try to let him punch himself out and don't even think about trying to wear him down with bodyblows. Reality has done so much with it's midsection it's like punching a bank vault door.

punching my dreams and fantasies really isn't as rewarding. they whimper and run away, tail between legs leaving a sparkling slugs train of tears. then i have to go digging around under the bed and in cabinets looking for where they are hiding. i like to use milk and cookies or vodka and red bull to coax them back out and onto my lap again.

and punching walls really doesn't do anything constructive at all.
banging ones head against them makes a nice noise but head wounds bleed so damned much. reality makes a the best heavy bag of them all weighing in with mass of a thousand universes. make sure you wrap your hands... a thousand universes can do some damage to anyone's knuckles.
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 10:59 pm (UTC) (Link)

If I ever become emporer of the universe, I am going to make you be my personal bedtime story teller.
chuteboxe From: chuteboxe Date: April 19th, 2004 03:31 pm (UTC) (Link)
When your in trouble, you have to be trouble. *smooch*
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 10:55 pm (UTC) (Link)
That's correct.

That also reminded me of Pee-Wee's Big Adventure.

"The mind plays tricks on you. You play tricks back! It's like you're unraveling a big cable-knit sweater that someone keeps knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting..."

You wouldn't be happy that you gave me that smooch were it real. Not after a stinky kitty mouth, belonging to Penelope Carrots herself, just licked my entire face to a raw mangled slate. That's an exaggeration, but not by much.
chuteboxe From: chuteboxe Date: April 20th, 2004 11:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh Emma, your adorable, I hope you dont mind that you are.
lsdtangerine From: lsdtangerine Date: April 19th, 2004 05:09 pm (UTC) (Link)
Makes sense to me, I agree wholeheartedly.
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 11:07 pm (UTC) (Link)
:)

And for that I am glad.
disclaim_her From: disclaim_her Date: April 19th, 2004 09:32 pm (UTC) (Link)
would it help if i kidnapped you?
we'll go make a ruckus.
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 19th, 2004 11:14 pm (UTC) (Link)
You don't ever have to ask such silly questions.

The world was made for Stephani and Emma to make a ruckus. Few people knew that fact. That's good. We like sneak attacks.

<3
disclaim_her From: disclaim_her Date: April 22nd, 2004 12:13 am (UTC) (Link)
seriously, girlie.
come visit kitty and i.

aaaannnnddd... i have keys to mary's apartment. we can break in and move all of her stuff while she's at work.

hehe.
she'll be so confused when she gets home.
From: ex_nascent722 Date: April 21st, 2004 08:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
I feel like that when I'm confined. You gotta shock yourself, subject yourself to something you dont normally do. That always makes things come back around into perspective. I dream up so much shit, that I expect those things to happen. I have learned that you cannot expect shit to happen, you just have to *allow synchronicities to occur, or more so, create the right state of mind for them to happen. I guess im a romantic, how I see life, but of course, I dont live like I dream, or fantasize how I should be living, so im merely confined like so. Sometimes in class I want to blurt shit out, opposing a viewpoint,or be critical towards someones view or whatever, but I dont, or hell, just yell something irrelavent out to see peoples faces drop. Us humans have been conditioned to be complacent. I should blurt shit out though. sometimes I want to push an old lady down and laugh, but I dont, I should. no, im kidding. But anyways, you got to do something erratic, unusual. Never be too usual, you'll die a slow death!! i promise. your life is a book really, you have to live it so that when you die, and big brother black sucks up your soul, you will be bored out there in that cosmos, and want to read something to Big brother black, what better then your life story?????? make it interesting if you can. life is to manifest those day-dreams, but ironically enough, its an inadvertant process, thats why its so fucking confusing, ya know?

or you could say fuck it, and go by a big quart of ice cream, and a pint of whiskey, and say to fuck with it all. not long after, you get a knock on the door, and its sister sychronicity, she says "eh, I got something for you", but you are too drunk to pay attention, so you shut the door, not getting your "present". sad though, but really, it dont matter, because your drunk and full of ice cream.
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 26th, 2004 09:35 am (UTC) (Link)

but really, it dont matter, because your drunk and full of ice cream.

OH man.

This whole thing was seriously great. Haha. You should tell me stories like this more often.

Also...story exchange? MM?

lanky_bastard From: lanky_bastard Date: April 22nd, 2004 08:00 am (UTC) (Link)

P.S

You've known me one year
You should read the past entries
They're pretty classic
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 26th, 2004 09:33 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: P.S

I agree.

I hope you know how happy I am to know you. You add such a brilliant part to the story.

There's more to be said later, but I'm late for class.

lanky_bastard From: lanky_bastard Date: April 26th, 2004 08:39 pm (UTC) (Link)

P.P.P.S

More praise to be said?
I know I make you happy
And that makes me smile
statikcat From: statikcat Date: April 26th, 2004 08:56 am (UTC) (Link)
oops sorrry that was me. i was looking at old stuff. anyway what I meant to say was i never see you online anymore!
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: April 26th, 2004 09:32 am (UTC) (Link)
Whaaaat!? Are you hanging out with Annika again? DUDE, if you are...I want stories,and her face...so I can punch it.

p.s. this dialup lifestyle is fucking me up bad. sorry our conversations keep getting chopped up.

p.p.s. plans to hang out soooon! mm?
statikcat From: statikcat Date: April 26th, 2004 10:02 am (UTC) (Link)
hah. no i logged in as her because i was trying to get an auth code for a community i made but then i realized you didnt need them anymore. and forgot i was logged in under that name. im sure she does need punched in the face. ;)
powersparkles From: powersparkles Date: May 2nd, 2004 03:35 am (UTC) (Link)
sometimes my daydreams become so intense that i can eat them on a pizza. but i have to concentrate. hard.

hey, your "april 2004" calender is fun to look at. do you know why?
girlsetsfire From: girlsetsfire Date: May 9th, 2004 12:24 am (UTC) (Link)
haha. Oh man. I didn't even notice that. There must have been a strange brain clock installed for april.

i misss you dave.
achalanatha From: achalanatha Date: May 16th, 2004 10:20 pm (UTC) (Link)

An Explanation Is In Order

Jesus you people are distractable. Does anyone remember the original question? Oh wait there wasn't one. See? You distracted me already!
What did you screw up Em? Your vagueness leaves a little to be desired in the way of explanation.
38 human choked on their own vomit and died || ...but i love you